Disturbia

     Nothing very exciting has happened in my life, recently.  However, I was plagued by horrible nightmares last night.  I do not remember much about them, only that while I was asleep it felt as though something evil were running my dreams and that I couldn't escape from them.  I remember that I was living in a house with other people my age, and my room was small and wooden, with a bed that resembled the coffin-like containers on "Dollhouse".  I know that the people in the house were really mean to me and verbally abused me and attacked me.  I remember running out to ice skate in order to get away from the house for a while, but, somehow, I couldn't get away from people that were hurting me.  I remember a torn up book as well, maybe a book I'd been trying to read....  I remember the pain being so bad that I could barely stand it.  There was some sort of memory issue in the dream; the other people couldn't remember who I was, or had chosen to shun me in such a way for a period of time.  I think I triumphed in the end, actively or passively, I don't remember how.  I think the whole nightmare was so horrible, that I've repressed some of it.  I know that we don't always (accurately) remember our dreams or nightmares, but I remember trying to wake up and tell myself in the nightmare that it was just a dream, that people weren't really hurting me, but not being able to convince myself that this was true.

     From what I've read about dreams, nightmares and anxiety, I think this was an anxiety dream.  My left arm kept feeling weird and every time I checked my pulse after having felt weirdness in my arm, it was racing.  Strangely, I wasn't having palpitations, because I wasn't aware of my heartbeat; I made myself aware of it.  I think I'd had way too much sugar and caffeine that day!

     I have had a lot of weird dreams that made me think that some (or THE) evil force was controlling my dreams or interfering with them.  I think they're too creepy to put on my blog, though!  Dreams can be fun if they're wacky and surrealistic, but I'm just left disturbed when I'm being attacked and feel completely out of control throughout the nightmare!

     Sorry this post is kind of boring.  Here are some funnier dreams I've had: When I was little, I had a dream that my mom had become a vampire, but this particular kind of vampire was actually a little yellow Sony Walkman (that's right, the tape deck, not the CD player....).  I remember that we were all trying to save her and bring her back into normal, human, mortal form,  I told my mom about it the next day, and, to this day, she has not forgiven me for it!  I also used to dream about Space Quest because I was always playing it on my Nokia, back in the day.  I've figured out Calculus problems in my sleep that I had not previously understood consciously.  I also had a dream last semester that someone asked me how I remembered the IPA symbol /Y/, and I replied, "Well, it looks just like the flux capacitor from Back to the Future".  I have also been, in various dreams, Buffy or a Power Ranger (when I was younger), and I've somehow participated in adventures with The Doctor from "Doctor Who".  I am beginning to realize that my dreams are kind of dorky....