existential lunch break

     I just got home from proctoring an exam, and I'm already hungry for lunch (since I had breakfast at 7:30 am).  Bewildered as to what I should choose to snarf and cloudy-headed from having spent an hour and 40 minutes proctoring, studying, reading and generally not being a morning person, I googled, "What should I have for lunch".  

     Apparently many people suffer from the despair of luxury and choices, as this yielded 58,500,000 results (okay, 24,100 with quotes).  On page 2 of the results, I found a post from someone who had written, "I know it's only 10 am, but I'm already thinking about lunch.  What should I have today?"  

     While I love that I'm not alone in planning meals hours in advance, and especially that I'm not alone in planning them at that very hour, it's a little weird whenever I google something I'm thinking, to see that others have thought the same thing.  The lunch thing, okay, pretty common.  But it makes me wonder how many of my other thoughts are actually "original".  I thought I was weird and crazy when I had trouble believing that I exist, but, lo and behold, "existential depression" yields 13,200 results, "I feel as if I don't exist", 898, and, the more favorable, "I feel like I don't exist", 6,960.  I feel sometimes that I've come to some great revelation (at least to myself), and then I find somebody's already written it, already said it, already thought it out.  All I have left to do is buy the t-shirt.  When I was little, I was playing my violin and realized that if I moved my left hand closer to me, down the fingerboard, I could produce the same notes on a lower string as on a higher string.  When I gleefully demonstrated this to my parents, they said, "Yes!  Very good, that's 2nd/3rd/4th position!"

     This all really helps my existential depression, doesn't it?  Well, I keep on pushing anyway, and I feel quite lively at the moment, although the spaces under my eyes feel tired and it feels as if there is cotton inside my head.  Now what am I going to eat for lunch today...?